The Marauding Marauders
by mcfly42
Summary: The Maruaders have created something that will change their Hogwarts marauding days. With lots of laughs, lots of pranks, and a little bit of romance, this fic has it all!


**Chapter one**

The Great Gobble

It was the day before school started, James and Sirius were to meet Remus and Peter in Hogsmeade, but they decided to have a peek in 'Zonkos joke shop to have a little surprise in store for Remus and Peter,

"How much dosh you got?" James asked

"Err, on me I've got sixteen sickles and twelve Knuts, you?"

"Well I've got," James paused to count, "well one galleon and three sickles,"

"Well James, what shall we get?" but James had already seen something that had caught his eye, "What you seen?"

"Well it's called 'Turkey Delight', it says here: the person who licks it will immediately sound like a turkey, the effects stay for up to as long as you desire."

"Wicked, we've got to try this on Wormtail,"

"I know Peter's really gullible," remarked James,

"Do you think we've got time to go and buy some normal Turkish Delights?" asked Sirius, "because one on its own looks suspicious," James looked at his watch,

"Five minutes till we meet them at the Three Broomsticks,"

"We'll have time, come on." So they ran to buy some Turkish Delights, to be sure they gave the right one to poor Peter, they ate all the sweets bar two, the fake one and one other,

"Make sure you know which ones which," James said trying not to laugh,

"I'm not just a pretty face you know, I'm not stupid!" said Sirius, tossing his hair sarcastically,

"Aren't you?"

"Shurrup," Sirius said pushing James into a crowd of well-dressed wizards and witches; Sirius tried his hardest not to laugh,

"I'm so sorry sir, madam, I tripped you see, are you alright?" James said smugly with a sideways glance at Sirius, who by now had gone red in the face with trying not to laugh,

"You should be sorry," A snobby woman said then turned to her friend, "People now days, no respect for their elders…and I don't know what you are laughing at young man this is no laughing matter,"

"Sorry mam," They said together in a child voice, "We won't do it again, promise," James sniggered,

"Very well, off you go," James and Sirius's laughs could have been heard a mile away. As the group of adults moved away they could hear the lady saying, "No respect whatsoever, parents fault always the parents,"

"Charming," James managed to say through loud sniggers," It was all your fault Sirius,"

"Moi, no, never me."

Finally they were at the Three Broomsticks; they saw Remus and Peter already sitting there by the fire,

"Oi, Moony, Wormtail over here!" Yelled Sirius from across the pub, he received a lot of dirty looks from the customers

"Hi Moony, how are you today?" asked James, "and you Wormtail, how are you?"

"Were have you been, your five minutes late. We were about to come looking for you, and call a search party and call Dumbledore," teased Remus

"Well a long story really. Prongs here fell into a crowd of snobs…"

"You Pushed Me!" James Stated

"Fell, pushed, potato potata, anyway, this snobby lady stopped Prongs, and told him off, of course I was laughing so she started on me, so we said we were 'sorry'" and ran off, we heard her say something about blaming parents, and oh yeah, do you want a Turkish Delight, Wormtail?"

"I would," said Remus

"Oh, um, sure," Sirius lowered his voice, "hey James which one was which?" James reached into the box a picked out a sweet, hoping it to be the real one he gave it to Remus and the other one to Peter.

"I've never tried these before, what are they like?" asked Peter

"Well wormtail find out for yours-"but James was cut off by a sudden gobble,

"Oh dear, Padfoot, um I think we gave Moony the wrong one,"

"I guessed that for myself Prongs,"

"What's going on?" asked Peter,

"Well we bought a Turkey Delight from Zonkos, whoever eats it will sound like a Turkey until either me or Padfoot tells it to stop," Remus wrote on a scrap bit of paper as he could not speak, MAKE IT STOP!

"But we don't know how!" sniggered Sirius

"Maybe we just say, 'we command you to stop making him sound like a Turkey?' go on try it,"

"No you do it prongs," James rolled his eyes and faced Remus and told him to open his mouth, "I command you to stop making our friend sound like a turkey…did it work? Say something Moony," but all they heard was a, 'Gobble, gobble' from Remus,

"Oh dear, what do we do now?" James asked

"I know, why don't you take him back to Zonkos and get Mr Zonko to fix him,"

"That's not a bad idea Wormtail, come on Moony, Prongs lets go."

So they went back to Zonkos. Inside Peter rung the bell on the desk only to find he got an electric shock, so James shouted for Mr Zonko, he emerged from the back, he was a young fellow, with an ever smiling face, his eyes were a dark brown, but then turned to owls eyes, then to cats eyes, then back to human eyes,

"Hi, well earlier we bought a turkey delight, and we don't know how to stop it,"

"Oh that's easy all you need to do is, the person who gave the sweet to the victim must walk like a turkey and say, 'I am the turkey not him or her'" said Mr Zonko,

"Oh that's easy," Sirius said and was about to start when Mr Zonko said,

"BUT you must do it where you gave the victim the sweet, you must not have read the small print, one of my new inventions, now which one of you bought the sweet?" James and Sirius put their hands up, "ahh and which one of you is the victim?" Remus gave a short gobble, "now where did you give him the sweet?"

"The Three Broomsticks," Sirius said looking at James, "But couldn't we just leave him like that?"

"No, if you leave him like that for three hours and do not change him back, you will have a spell put on you, but I haven't tried the spell yet, so I don't know the consequences, I didn't want to." Mr Zonko said with a shudder,

"Well if you say so," James complained.

So off they went back to the Three Broomsticks, it was just their luck that it was now lunchtime and the pub was bursting with people, they went to sit down in the same place as before,

"Ok come on Prongs," Sirius called,

"Your enjoying this aren't you," James said as he reluctantly moved into a space. And they were off, firstly Sirius started to bob his head and make turkey noises, James followed his lead, they chanted exactly the words Mr Zonko told them to say, "we are the turkeys not him, we are the turkeys not him" They did this for about five minutes and then stopped,

"Surely it must have worked by now!" remarked a blushing James, "We've been doing it for five minutes!"

"Actually," Remus said, "I was cured after a few seconds but…well you looked ridiculous! Everyone was staring at you, you see those two old ladies over there," he pointed to the old ladies, who were now smoking a long pipe, "well they were cheering you on!"

"You little…why didn't you tell us Wormtail?" James scowled

"I didn't know, honestly!"

"Oh well, you alright now Moony?" asked Sirius,

"Brilliant actually!"


End file.
